Category Archives: Uncategorized

Pandora Out of The Box

Last night my living room experienced political upset in the form of Pandora’s elimination from RuPaul’s Drag Race. We have inevitably come to the portion of the competition where everyone is pretty awesome and whoever goes will be missed. Kind of. Over the past few weeks I have loved Tatiana and Raven. But lately Tatiana’s bratty charm has worn thin and her drag game has suffered. She should have been kicked off last week but for some reason she still remains to lip sync another day.

Raven on the other hand has been rocking it hard ever since she was in the bottom two twice in a row. Her hatred for Tatiana has gotten stronger with each week and it’s nothing short of great. She has quickly become my favorite with one exception: Jujubee. Jujubee is flat out the funniest one of the group and the drag persona is equally sassy and bitchy. Last night she looked her best with her shorter hair and giant zebra earrings, but sadly she chose some ugly short hair do for her drag mother and was placed in the bottom two. She lip synced, danced, and wowed the judges resulting in Pandora’s elimination and lots of tears. And I bet my bottom dollar either Jujubee or Raven wins the whole damn thing.

Oh yeah, and Tyra Sanchez still exists. Tyra falls under that category of awesome at what she does but is a terrible human being. I’m torn because she chooses great outfits and hair styles and has a lot of drag talent, but I just want that awful person off my screen pronto.

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Grab the tissues and text your mom, it’s Parenthood

Parenthood finally premiered this week on NBC, and forgive me sounding like Rachael Ray gushing about cider gravy, but I freaking loved it. I mean, how could Ron Howard take a cast like Peter Kraus and Lauren Graham and screw it up? The show is about four siblings and their varying stages of parenthood they are navigating. They laugh, fight, have family dinners, worry about children, and drink wine. It’s like Brothers & Sisters except with a more narrowed purpose. This show is good and needs to be watched, and a cast like this cannot go to waste.

The plot lines in the first episode set us up for all sorts of familial drams. Adam and Christina’s son Max is diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome by the educational psychologist and also with terminal cuteness by myself. Seriously, the kid has a curly mop of hair and big brown eyes. Not to mention he isn’t remotely annoying. Y’all, while I will shout my love of Peter Kraus from a mountain, I have always harbored a secret crush on Monica Potter. This is for reasons I cannot explain, but that is life.

Sarah and her two rebellious hellions move back in with the grandparents because mom is out of money after divorcing her drug addicted rocker ex-husband. The daughter is arrested with her cousin for weed possession, but they live in freaking Berkley, so is it that big of a deal? The son gets emo and runs off to Fresno because living with a drug addicted parent is better than nothing. Sara goes on a blind date with that dude who was on Yes, Dear and gets busted trying to get nookie in the family room. Oh sweet lord, how unbelievably good it is for Lauren Graham, or forever as Lorelai Gilmore, to be back on television. And of course she does an awesome job and still looks hot as hell. Props.

Those two siblings were the most interesting so I’ll be brief in this next part. Dax Sheppard plays another sibling, named Crosby, and both of those facts make me cringe. Another thing that is cringe worthy is him finding frozen sperm in his idiot girlfriend’s freezer, because she is 34 and wants a baby, darn it! Crosby (ahh what a stupid name) promises to kind of maybe marry his crazy sperm hoarding girlfriend instead of running for the hills like he should. But wait, there’s more! A dancer from his sexy past shows up and surprise surprise, they have a bam chicka wow wow love child together. Looks like he’s gonna have to get over his fear of commitment and fatherhood quick! Oh, irony, how nice of you to join us.

Erika Christensen, who I last saw in Swim Fan, is the last sibling, Julia, and honestly I didn’t get that she was related until like, the end of the episode. Julia is a hard working lawyer lady who is so busy she can’t see her daughter and as a result is shunned from reading her child bedtime stories or cutting her meat. Dirty. Her husband Joel is a nice man, good father, and loves ping pong, as does everyone else in the family. Maybe it’s a West coast thing, who knows.

And there’s Craig T. Nelson and the mother somewhere in the mix, but all we learn about them is that dad is pushy, mom is probably a hippie, and there’s a secret stash of condoms in dad’s office. All I’m saying is if he’s cheating, at least he’s wearing a condom.

Maniac Mother Teresa

Modern Family was a rerun this week, but considering I missed it the first time around it was new to me. Luckily this particular episode turned out to be one of the funniest so far.

Cameron and Mitchell were running late to a puppet show for their daughter when they see the gardener crying. Cam takes pity on this poor man and invites him in with hilarious broken Spanish. The phrase “maniac Mother Teresa” is used and it was awesome. What follows is a slew of family members of the gardener arriving at the house and Cam ends up hosting a Mexican wedding in his and Mitchell’s living room.

Gloria hates the new life sized dog butler statue Jay brought back from Las Vegas and calls it the devil. Several quick scenes show her walking past it forgetting it is there and then freaking out and screaming at it. This plot was cleverly written with Gloria walking in on Jay talking at wrong parts of his conversation, leading her to believe he’s in love with and wants to marry the dog. In the end Jay pawns the statue off to Cam and Mitchell, and Cam does a hilarious voice for the dog as Mitchell forces him to sell it to a thrift shop. My love for Cameron knows no end!

Clair finds a dirty picture on the family laptop and accuses Luke of looking at it, but in reality it was a forward to Phil he got from a coworker. Phil lets Luke take the fall until finally it is realized who the real porn king is. Phil apologizes to Luke and in the end Clair really isn’t that mad anymore. I promise you this story was way funnier that I described it as.

The one complaint, no Manny in this episode!

Drama on the Block

After three weeks Desperate Housewives is new tonight with more wacky mysteries and antics of a wayward stripper. Dear god I’m starting to be over this show.

Big Girls Don’t Cry

Mystique finally got booted off of RuPaul’s Drag Race this week, and rightly so. It’s not that I’m against overweight drag queens, but when the drag queen in question is whiny, looks bad in drag, and can’t even pull off a Western look? Send her packing, dammit! The viewing audience breathed a collective sigh of relief during her elimination knowing that we will never ever have to see her attempt to do the splits again.

The final nail in Mystique’s buffet bar was that she didn’t really wow the judges during her team’s commercial spot, which is sad because overall they had the most entertaining commercial. It came down to a lip sync for your life between her and Raven, and if we’ve learned anything about Raven thus far, she is good until it could all be taken away, then she kicks ass and gets shit done. So if you’re ever up against Raven in a head to head, you might as well start walking home. But on that note, Raven, you need to step it up! You are obviously talented and look great in drag, but no more of this bottom two nonsense! The judges will only forgive you so many times.

Ready, Set, DRAG

RuPaul’s Drag Race is back for another sexually confused season on Logo! Does the youth of today even know who RuPaul is outside of his cameo in The Brady Bunch Movie? I for one love drag queens and this show. It’s just so ridiculous. But what an honor to be named the country’s top drag queen. Much more prestigious than being named 1st place in your local gay dance club’s tighty whitey strip show. You go, girls.

Coming Soon- Parenthood

This long, disgusting winter needs to end now. You know what else needs to end? Winter hiatus! Pretty soon our favorites such as Gossip Girl, Flashforward, and V will be returning as well as a host of new shows hoping to gain acceptance. One such show that starts up on March 1 on NBC is Parenthood.

Not only is the cast stellar, featuring Lauren Graham, Peter Krause, and Craig T. Nelson, but it’s based off of the equally awesome 80’s flick of the same name which starred Rick Moranis, Dianne Weist, and Steve Martin. It is directed by Ron Howard, who also did the original movie. Dear God typing those last few sentences sent me into a deliriously¬† happy state. NBC better not muck this up because I love both Graham and Krause and to not only have them back on my screen but together no less is nothing short of amazing. And it also looks like Arrested Development‘s little Ann Veal plays Graham’s daughter. Excellent.

The premise is pretty much what you’d expect, a sprawling family drama taking on all the ho-hum details of everyday family life. Given the success of Modern Family and Brothers & Sisters, this definitely looks like a winner. Keep space free on your DVR!